Wayfaring MD: Missionary Physician

I dreamed last night that I had one test left to take before graduation, and I overslept. I didn’t oversleep by a few minutes. No, I overslept by like 2 hours. And at that point I didn’t even try to make it in for the test. My school always calls people if they haven’t signed in 10 minutes before our testing begins (and they try really hard not to start without people), so in the dream I looked at my phone to see if PJ, our wonderful test hander-outer, had called me. But no one from the school had tried to contact me—not PJ, not a friend, nothing. So in the dream I told myself I had grounds to fight if the school wouldn’t let me make up the test—because I didn’t get my “test is about to start” warning phone call. 

I blame this dream on sleep apnea, Spring Forward (I did end up almost being late for church because I overslept), and a smidge of end-of-the-year almost-graduation anxiety. 

So apparently now I’m not grown up enough to decide when I can and can’t go to the freaking doctor. Med school wants to run EVERY aspect of my life. I feel like I’m in a cult or something. 

IN A NUTSHELL: After all my waiting / searching /begging/ getting yelled at on the examining table, I have finally found a doctor. I mean, I’ve only been waiting since November for someone to listen to my freakin heart. 

QUALIFIER: In order to get in with this new doc (who was recommended by 3 different people, so hopefully she’ll be awesome), my options were to see her Nurse Practitioner (here we go again) this week or wait till APRIL to see the actual doctor. Well dangit, I don’t feel good and I’m tired of waiting, so I went with the NP option.

THE COMPLICATION: Next Tuesday was the only available spot, so I took it and was elated because I also have my next dentist appointment then to finish up the last 5 of my 11 fillings. Did I mention this is a 4 hour appointment? Yeah, not a piddly tooth cleaning that I can easily reschedule. This doc had to rearrange her patient schedule to fit me in as a courtesy, since my schedule is so nuts. I thought it was smart to stack all my appointments in the same day so I wouldn’t have to deal with getting permission to be gone several times. I was wrong. 

THE RULES: Keep in mind now that we get 2 unexcused days for sick days/doctor visits, and most people just take the days and ask forgiveness afterward. I was being a good student and informing them ahead of time. At MUSM, it’s always easier to ask forgiveness than permission, as I will now illustrate.

MONDAY: I e-mail the clerkship director for Family Medicine (who is both my former advisor and a faculty member who I would consider to be a friend) to let him know that I’d be missing the day and see if I needed to make anything up.  His secretary replied saying, “First, thanks for letting us know in advance of your doctor appointment needs. I discussed this request with Dr. R and Orientation week is not a good time to miss. He prefers that you book appointments during your scheduled off time during the rotation. Study Time is provided every Friday PM after 1:30PM….. Weeks 4-7 would be best to work something out during the rotation for the appointments, if possible, but we may review together.”

1. My e-mail was not a request for time off. It was a friendly offer to make up the time I would be missing later. I was simply letting y’all know in advance where I would be.

2. Orientation WEEK? Every other clerkship has an orientation MORNING. I figured that as long as it wasn’t the first day, I wouldn’t be missing anything. I’ve been in the hospital 6 months. I’m oriented. Give me a break. 

3. I have tried rescheduling, believe me I have. No doctor in AMERICA is open on Friday afternoons, and if they are, they’re either 1)quacks 2) in desperate need of patients, or 3) not taking new patients at that time. On top of that, no dentist is open on Friday either. And every dentist I ever went to only did procedures in the mornings. For goodness’ sake, my dentist in T’ville saw me after-hours on “doctor’s night” as a courtesy. Folks up here in Mac-town don’t roll like that. Hello, the only reason I have Friday afternoon off is because OUR clinic is closed, so why would you expect other places to be open?

4. Week 4-7? Really? So I’ve been trying to see a doctor since November, and now you’re telling me I have to wait until February-March? Also, everyone knows you have to make appointments forever in advance if you’re a new patient, which I can’t do if I get my schedule 1 week in advance. Meanwhile, my teeth are rotting and my heart is trying its best to explode inside my chest. But sure, I’ll wait. 

5. If possible? So you want me to come to your office so you can tell me which days I’m allowed to go to the doctor? How bout not. How bout I call in with the flu on Tuesday and go to my appointments like originally planned.  Why have UNEXCUSED days if I have to ask permission to take them, and then get shot down when I ask?

What boss at any other job would respond “NO” when you called in sick? That’s what I’m trying to do here. This is insane. I’m gonna pray for the pregnant girl in my rotation, because her baby’s either not gonna get any prenatal care or be born looking crazy because his mama was so stressed out dealing with the administration.

WEDNESDAY: I go fight the man. I called the dean (my current advisor, who is also a friend and happens to be the former Family Medicine clerkship coordinator) and got her on my side. She told me to talk to the coordinator in person. So I did. His “compromise” was to give me a half day. At this point, I’ll take what I can get, but I’ll be angry about it anyway. 

WASTED ARGUMENT: His reason for not giving me the day was that “People tend to not take Family Medicine seriously and they try to make this a vacation rotation. They think that we’re not as serious of a rotation as surgery or others, so we have to hold strong to our rules.” 

REALLY!?: You’re using THAT argument on ME, the PRESIDENT of the Family Medicine Interest Group? Me, the ONLY student in my class who wants to go into Family Medicine? REALLY? I’m the ONLY person who takes this rotation seriously, although I’m starting to lose a lot of that respect. 

Something is seriously wrong when you have to ask a doctor’s permission to go to the doctor, and he says no. 

I went to the dentist last week and found out that, as a result of 1) missing 2 years’ worth of dentist appointments 2) not flossing regularly, and 3) grinding my teeth like it’s my job, I now have 11 cavities. Count ‘em, 11. Grrr. Well, 10 if you don’t count one old one that was already filled—but I ground out the filling.  My mom was initially disgusted, but then she remembered that her sister had 14 when she was my age. Apparently, some females in their early 20s have weird things happen to their teeth. I reckon it’s hormones or something. 

So on Thursday I have to go get as many of them I can filled. Unfortunately my dentist was all booked up this week, so he is fitting me in on “doctor’s night” after hours. I feels special. I’ll get as many of them done as we can and then he’ll refer me to someone in Macon. Who knows when I’ll have time (or money!) to get the rest done.

You know what’s funny? My teeth didn’t hurt at all until after I went to the dentist last week and got “diagnosed”. And of course now that it’s Christmas there’s desserts all over the place and they all make my teeth ache.