I like that idea! Excellent gift idea, especially for pediatricians-to-be.
I always have a hard time thinking of things I want for Christmas, and my list is always very short. I’m all about non-work related gifts. When I’m at home, I don’t want to think about work (though I also like Cranquis’ list of meddie-specific gifts).
Personally, I’m asking for a new iPod stereo type thingy, because when I’m not at work I need music pretty much constantly in my life, and my old stereo died and a music-less morning getting ready experience makes me sad.
As for your friend or any resident in general, give gifts of things they rarely get to enjoy because of work, or things they normally wouldn’t buy for themselves.
There will be a separate medical-themed gift ideas post coming soon ;)
As Cranquis pointed out, the more patients signed in from the same family, the more likely the complaint is viral. But in this case, asthma isn’t contagious.
Me to MomofTwofer: What can I do for you guys today?
MomofTwofer: Well Sally* has asthma and she started coughing this morning and it got real bad so I wanted to get her checked out.
Me: Mmmkay. And does brother have the same issue?
MomofTwofer: No. I mean, he coughs sometimes just like randomly like you know when you get choked up when you eat or something but really I just wanted him checked out to be sure he wasn’t going to get sick later.
Me: Ummmm …. I can’t guarantee he won’t get sick later. But let’s get back to Sally.
Twofer: an office visit where 2 patients, usually relatives, are placed in the same room to have a joint visit or successive visits. Most common in pediatrics, it is the basis of the Cranquis Twofer Principle of Virology. The twofer, along with its more elusive cousins the threefer and fourfer, inspired the postulation of the Wayfaring Time Vacuum Theory, which states that for each doubling of the number of patients in an exam room (N), the time needed for the visit (T) increases exponentially (T^N). Unfortunately, the time given for a 2N or 3N visit is often not even equal to 2T or 3T, but rather 2/3T or, in flu season, 1/4T.
It was a hit.
After discussing the phenomenon of hot oil explosions after combining frozen turkeys with boiling grease…
Resident: This lady has been seizure free for 2 years. Can I go ahead and stop her Keppra or do I need to taper it?
Attending: Better taper it. You can’t quit that cold turkey. She’ll explode in seizures.
"Hey, will you real quick sign this lab order for Mr. Not-Your-Patient? Dr. AlwaysLate isn’t here yet to sign it and the patient is already in the lab."
"Hey, before you go in that exam room, can you shoot a quick refill Rx to CVS for Ms. ElderlyPatient since Dr. GeriAtric is on night float?"
"Hey, Dr. NeverAnswersHisPhoneMessages has 3 call backs from this patient and he still hasn’t called them back. Do you mind calling them? It looks like a simple enough matter."
"Ugh, why don’t you tell the attending that he isn’t answering messages? But sure, I’ll get to it sometime today."
"Hey Wayfaring, this patient is here for her appointment with Dr. XY, but wants to see a female provider today. Can you squeeze her in?"
" *sigh* I reckon. Hopefully someone else will no-show."
"It’s the good ones that get dumped on," Jamie, the floater nurse, said as she forwarded me yet ANOTHER phone note on someone else’s patient. Doctor not in office today. Patient has called twice already, does not want to wait for PCP.
"Don’t start with me, Jamie! You think this is funny, but it’s not," I replied. "Seriously, is anyone else around here answering phone messages and calling in refills, or am I covering everyone’s patients now?"
"Oh Dr. Wayfaring, it’s just little things here and there. You’re one of the few who doesn’t give us a hard time when we ask you to cover other people’s stuff."
I just got frisked and searched today actually because my pants were sagging too low when I went through security(because they make you take your belt off?!?!!!!!!???)
I always get the most thorough search possible at airports. Even back in the day when they singled people out “randomly” to check their shoes, I always got picked. Now I always get the full body scan and complete body patdown, even overseas. I’m pretty sure when they start introducing random cavity searches I will always be selected for that too. I guess I just have that terrorist look about me.
OB Clerkship director: Guys, don’t forget about your OSCEs tomorrow afternoon.
Me: When do I do mine?
OBCD: Tomorrow afternoon with everyone else.
Me: But I’m on call tonight. So I’m going home at noon tomorrow.
OBCD: And you can come back in at 3 for your OSCE with everyone else.
Me: What? Even if I’m up all night?
OBCD: Yup. Sucks to be you.
Nurse Yankee working up one of my well-child check patients: Any concerns about baby today?
Patient with infant: Hers got a sick muu muu.
Patient: You know, a sick…down there.
Nurse Yankee: ma’am, you’re an adult, your kid is too young to know what you’re saying, and I don’t have a damn clue what you’re talking about. What is wrong with her?
Patient: she’s scratching her privates.
Nurse Yankee: again, be specific here. Are we talking front? Back? Everywhere? Help me out here.
If you guys don’t see any posts from me anymore, it’s because I’ve been arrested for murdering my uncle for eating my Thanksgiving dinner that my grandma had wrapped up and saved just for me.
Holidays really bring out the best in people.
Patient: See I got this discharge…
Me: Mmmkay, what color is it?
Me: does it have an odor?
Patient: It smells like trash.